“It’s a long time between drinks”

At a prayer gathering for Christian leaders and clergy:

Me: “You’re a senior pastor of a big church, may I ask you a question?”

SP: ” Errhh, Yes ……. of course.”

Me: “Is it OK just to pray for someone when they are in need?”

SP: “What are you asking? Prayer is powerful.”

Me: “That is not what I’m asking.”

Silence, this bloke is cagey, he’s been around long enough to know people have agendas. knows not to walk into unwanted questions. He started to give signals he’d move on.

Me: “Look I’m not out to have a go at you, I’ve been a Christian fifty three years. I love the church, weep over her condition and long to see Church become the church in my life time if God permits.” I saw as I spoke interest popped into his eyes and his body relax. I approached him because he was one of the movers of this prayer gathering. When he led the gathering in his segment there was a distinct element of the Spirit, a genuineness others lacked.

SP: “So what’s your question? What’s your name?”

Me: “Wayne, my friends call me Crock.”

He nodded his head in acknowledgement.

So I continued.

Me: “Prayer for me is not something I do ..” he raised an eyebrow, “prayer is everything for me with being with my Father, sharing my heart with Him and He with me, a communing between the two of us.” I could see the OK go on signal.

SP: Patiently he waited. I got the impression he was waiting for a nugget.

Me: “So the question is this, as important as prayer is, prayer is not enough when there is a need?”

SP: “Correct.”

Me: “Then why do we use prayer to avoid our responsibilities?”

SP: “I’m not sure what you mean.”

Me: “Allow me to clarify, tonight we were praying for the abortion legislation the parliament is considering. For me that was nice, but not sufficient ……. because as valid as our prayers were I believe they bounced off the heavens ……. not because God is disinterested but because we are disinterested in what God wants to do through us ……”

SP: “Which is?” Now here was a different man of God, not threatened but open to a stranger, patient with my ramblings, very different. Most Pentecostal pastors would have escaped by now leaving me with a clear message I was not in the Spirit, or not ‘wanted, of no interest to them. I had better hurry before I dragged this out too long. I understand all too well how others can ‘collar’ you to push their pet theories they think you should know. Usually the agenda is to set you right because they are right. That was not my motivation, this man exhibited something I couldn’t define, something I had rarely encountered. What was it? I couldn’t put my fingers on it?

Me: “Look SP cutting to the chase, so often these prayer gatherings are a smorgasbord of our concerns we want God to do for us, I know we say it is for His righteousness, which is nice but we are asking the government to do what we are to do. The first three centuries of Christians were concerned about practical issues in the Roman Empire, such as infanticide, usually they were female babies unwanted; same as in China today. They didn’t merely pray to the Lord to remove infanticide or to have the Emperor start a programme to look after all these babies the parents were disposing of on the garbage dumps of the empire. Do you know what they did?”

SP: “No I don’t. What did they do.”

Me: “Remember most Christians in the first three centuries were poor, illiterate and ill resourced, not like us today, wealthy, well educated and many opportunities in life; too many I often think, they distract us from being who He has called us to be. However they had something we lack. They would actively go out to the garbage dumps, the fields, the riverbanks, the seashores wherever local parents dumped their newborns. they would find the children, take them into their homes and the local community of believers, rear them at their expense. You see they didn’t merely pray, they loved. Their love for their Lord caused them to lay their lives down for those around them, to hazard themselves ………….. They, by their love so influenced their society Christianity was an unstoppable force.”

His facial expression expressed doubt, questioning my statement without attempting to correct me or stop me.

Me: “It greatly disturbs me when we have these pray gatherings for the reason I have just said. We harangue God like He doesn’t care, when in fact He does. Simply we don’t understand what we say we believe. We don’t seem to understand what love is. I do not know how many times I have preached about love and everyone agrees then continues to live as they always have, sometimes with slight modifications to their lifestyles. Why do you think that is? It could be I’m a lousy preacher which is no doubt true. But I think it is more than that.”

SP: “Briefly what do you think it is? I have to go to a meeting with my pastors.”

Me: “Some years ago I had a stroke and resulting vertigo for six weeks. I was in hospital for six days. One senior colleague came up the hospital found he had got the message wrong because he thought it was another colleague. He simply turned around mumbling he thought it was the other bloke and left me there in emergency never to be seen again. He was too busy to deal with me and I was not significant enough for his attention. A well known man who you are friends with. At the time I was a single parent to two wonderful teenagers. Fortunately both my children were absent from home at the time away on high school retreats. I could barely stand never alone look after myself. I was left to my own devices. One brother who I had supported in his fellowship came to see me at home, accused me of carrying on too much. I didn’t hear from anyone else. After three weeks one brother who I wasn’t connected to, found out about my condition and came and ministered to me. He holds a special place in my heart to this day. So why do you think my colleagues were so unloving when I needed their help?”

There was a quiet as we maintained eye contact.

SP: “Wayne, I don’t know the circumstances but I am so sorry to hear you went through that. That is not how we are to be to one another. I have to go but I want to sit down with you because you are saying something I should think about.”

Me: “My children didn’t get to see the love of the Body for one of its members. What they did see was something they don’t want to be a part of. Yes I’d like to chat with you when I come to Sydney again. Thank you for your patience and listening.”

SP: “People don’t listen to you much, do they?”

Me: “They don’t think much of me never alone what I have to say. Why would they? I am a person of no account, no outward success or importance. So many of my brothers and sisters think I’m too down on the church, that I’m too negative. They have no idea of my heart, my weeping for His Body, that I have given my life to seeing His Body restored and whole. No, they never bother to find out who I am and what I believe. In typical Evangelical fashion they think I’m attacking ideas that are unassailable. Do you know what really saddens me?

SP: I waited as his silence continued, diplomatic, well trained professional but this man has a heart and he struggles. I see it in him. He is asking many questions. Aahh! there is the difference.

Me: “The Church of Jesus Christ suffers because we do not ‘discern the Body’.” He went to make a comment; I raised my hand then continued, “Today I see things happening in the Church I never saw twenty years ago.”

SP: “Wha …. what things?”

Me: “Sickness abounds, great financial difficulties, marriage divorce the same as the world when before Divorce was extremely unusual, children and youth illiterate of basic Bible stories, a lack of acceptance of the ways of God, they seem to be absent from our midst. Church has become a rock concert each meeting with little depth of teaching. then we wonder why we have forty year old babies still bleating they want their milk, or I’ll go elsewhere. There is no understanding of who Church is! Brother won’t talk to brother, sisters gossip causing dissension in the Body, God’s people living for themselves as if only Sunday mattered to live pious lives then the rest of the week they live like the world, need I go on?”

SP: Distress, so he hasn’t convinced himself all is well even though he’s successful, “So why do you think we are like that?” Aahh his heart, a passion behind that question.

Me: The Apostle Paul’s first epistle to the Corinthians said clearly a number of things about how we as the Body are to be.” He nodded an OK go on, ” he called himself a servant to all then he speaks about matters in the Church in Corinth, he uses a Greek word koinonia to describe the Lord’s table, which no doubt you are familiar with, then in speaking about the Lord’s table in chapter eleven he speaks again about communion, an interesting translation let me assure you, he says whoever eats the bread or drinks unworthily is guilty of the Lord’s Body and Blood. We are to examine ourselves so we don’t experience judgement upon ourselves because we do not discern the Lord’s Body. This statement is clearly made in the context of the community of believers. Then he makes an astounding statement, one that is no where else in such clarity in the New Testament. “For this reason many are weak and sickly among you and many are dead.”

SP: “There is some dispute with that interpretation and connection you make.”

Me: “Yes there is. Usually because people read or study it out of context. Consider this the chapters nine to eleven speak about our oneness and togetherness then the next three chapters twelve to fourteen are still about us the Body of Christ on this earth, not merely some mystical Body of Christ in the Heavens. the Apostle is speaking to the Church and says God judges us when we don’t act in His New Covenant as a community of believers who love one another, lay their lives down for one another by the giftings He has given to each. Paul speaks about order when the family comes together to partake of Lord’s Body and Blood. Anyway i leave that to you to take before the Lord. I have no desire to convince you I am right. Either you hear the Spirit or I’m not speaking by the spirit. We can’t get away with our lack of love. Your choice SP.”

SP: “I have to go. Thanks for sharing. The wilderness is a lonely place, my friend. I must go. Please keep in touch with me.”

Me: Not likely SP, not likely. I smiled as I thanked him for his time. A good typical statement of an executive clergy. “Keep in touch with me.” Interesting! Even the best of us are so tainted with a system that makes us less than we are.

Imagine Jesus saying to the man from the pool of Bethesda, “keep in touch with me”. No, when the religious elite of His day cast the man out, Jesus didn’t send a disciple, He went Himself. Therein lies the problem of the Church. We have too many wrong understandings, too many demands and expectations that divert us from doing His will; too busy to love, too busy to engage; too busy to understand something important is happening.

SP was an usual man, very usual. Yet I can’t imagine Jesus upping stakes in the middle of a dialogue to the woman by the well in Samaria because he had some appointment because of religious duty. Oh! yes that’s right He didn’t have religious duties; He was a free man who had no time for pretense, self importance and laying burdens upon others.

“I have food to eat of which you do not know”. then He said in reply to His disciples question, “My food is to do the will of Him who sent Me, and to finish His work.” John 4:33 -38

It’s a long time in between drinks, in the wilderness, even then the waters can be muddied by others. You turn around trudge along knowing one day all will end, the baton will be picked up by fellow wilderness wanderers. Even so come Lord Jesus.

By Eagleholme

Great quote re: church – author unknown

Just read this from Paul Richards quoting someone The Church does not exist for itself but to reveal God’s glory-His Holy character. We want to be people whose hearts are to carry the burden of the Lord. Our cities do not need to be taken. People need to be loved in such a way that they will surrender to the love of God. If you try to make me, I will fight you. If you love me, I will give myself to you; if you love me you can correct me. We want to break pieces of ourselves off and give it to another. Pray seriously that God would take the orphanage of stray kids in our own church body and form us into a family giving us the gift of community-the church of our dreams.

By Eagleholme

The Steady Stream of Discontent

What do you do when you love so much and the one you love injures others so much? Do you remain silent or do you try to positively input so they somehow will get the message? What do you do? Positiveness and pointing the direction rather than clearly stating the problems hasn’t worked, so what do you do?

I took a lesson from God, speak directly from love to the ones and their problem in such a way it is clear, concise and points the way forward. Then the response is the choice of the listener. We have forgotten how to hear the Spirit in the other, their words and their heart; regardless of the vessel who speaks and the rough manner delivered. We say God I’ll only hear those who speak in the positive manner I like. Instead we hear through our biases and process through our ever refining filters to ensure that only what is acceptable to us is heard. Of course if it is not couched in positiveness it must be wrong! So a lot of Pentecostal pastors preach these days. Their prophets preach ‘encouraging’ words tickling the ears of a people who love it so; well most love the status quo. There are some who weep for something more; usually they know not what.

The prophets who spoke God’s words in the Old Testament and the God who walked this earth had hard words for such religious people and pretenders who claimed to be the mouth piece of the Almighty. They paid a heavy price for not hearing what the Spirit was speaking – their religion they were protecting and their position they were so zealous in keeping was taken away from them, obliterated for nearly two thousand years. Remember who He is and who He cares for. He has come to His Church, a whip in one hand and soothing oil of peace in the other for those who would hear His voice, follow Him.

The issue is love. What do you love? Look well at your life – what consumes you is what you find important. Love decides importance because we give ourselves to what we believe and value. Importance is decided by what you give priority to. Priority is decided by what you allow to interupt what you are doing!

One can only wonder what would have been the result if Judaism had heard the voice of her Messiah?

I now have many times more once super-commited friends who were super-involved with institutional church who are not attending organised religion than those who are still attending. Of those still attending most sit quietly frustrated on the pew crying with heart felt yearning, “There has to be something more? Surely God you didn’t mean us to be like this?”

No, He didn’t mean for us to be merely grist for someone’s mill of ambition or fodder for someone else’s vision.

By Eagleholme

The Ways of God lead to blessing

Isaiah 58:   The message is timeless as a lesson for all people who would draw near to GOD.

Here was group of people who were very religious fulfilling the requirements of OT church. They fasted, they prayed, every day they went to the worship, offered sacrifices for sins, they thought they were pleasing GOD because they seemed to be delighting to learn about HIM. They acted like a nation of people who lived righteous lives and as if they lived in GOD’s requirement for them. Also they turned to GOD to get HIM to act on their behalf, they thought they wanted to be near GOD.

They asked “What are you on about GOD? What more can you expect us to do?” Look at us we have made effort we have been very hard on ourselves and we haven’t even caught your attention. YOU GOD are ignoring us! (How dare you after all our wonderful effort) Look what we have done for you! How ungrateful you are GOD.   (Is 58: 2 – 3a)

GOD’s reply is instructive to us today. Here is GOD’s reply to those people. (Is 58: 3b – 7)

“You are trying to please yourselves even in your greatest effort you call fasting.

Now remember they supposedly delight to know GOD yet GOD says of them

  • You pretend to humble yourselves (HE knows every heart and sees the true condition). Once in my early 20’s I was standing in my AoG church at Stafford In Brisbane and a visiting brother brought a strong rebuking prophecy saying You are rebellious, strong willed and stubborn. At the time I thought ‘someone’s in for it” Then I madea mistake before I realised it I asked “Is it me , Lord?’
  • You just don’t get it – you have not connected the dots – you say you want to learn about me  but you oppress your workers lay heavy burdens on them. You are oppressors not burden lifters. (Now there is a message for many full on over active churches)

“You don’t please me” GOD says “This is not what I want’

This is what I want!’

  • Set prisoners free who have been wrongfully imprisoned
  • Those who work with you lighten their burden – Wayne PS – the more evangelical charismatic Pentecostal a church the more inclined we are to put burdens on our supporters to accomplish our ends. We are not burden lifters we become oppressors and that is not the heart of GOD
  • The word of the LORD is set them free, do not bind them to yourself remove the chains of oppression and bondage, share what food you have with those who are hungry and open your homes to the homeless, give clothes to those who need them and do not hide from relatives who need your help.

In other words be Shephers who care Eze 34.

The consequences for any group of GOD’s people are enormous whether you choose to follow God or whether you choose to reject what GOD says.

For those who listen and decide to follow HE says

  • Salvation
  • Healing
  • Guidance, progress and maturity
  • Glory of GOD and protection
  • THEN dialogue with GOD. He will acknowledge you

Here is the amazing thing after HE says all these benefits HE reiterates HIS warning plead

  • Remove the heavy yoke of oppression.
  • Stop pointing your finger and spreading vicious rumors!
  •  Feed the hungry,
  • and help those in trouble.

Then HE reiterates the benefits to us who hear and forsake our own way

  • We will become light
  • And behold the darkness around us will become like the noonday
  • The Lord will guide you continually,
  • giving you water when you are dry
  • and restoring your strength.
  • You will be like a well-watered garden,
  • like an ever-flowing spring.

Then a promise of a profound ministry.  Some of you will rebuild the deserted ruins of your cities. Then you will be known as a rebuilder of walls and a restorer of homes.

  • Then HE speaks about rest. Now the OT people equated rest with the Sabbath
  • As NT people our rest is more profound, more encompassing the whole of life
  • Honor the Sabbath in everything you do on that day, and don’t follow your own desires or talk idly.

The question is one of closeness

The ways of God continually call for those who hear to follow. The passage is about discipleship, the Cross and for laying down of life for others so His Kingdom may come to them.

  • Either we walk in His Ways or we are doing things our way – the two are not compatible, neither do they complement each other – His ways are higher than our ways – a lesson each soul and each group of His people have to learn
  • Either we deal with the sins of our ways or He will deal with us in life with loving discipline to bring us back into health, well-being and a joyous satisfaction knowing we are in a good place because He is there. Revelation 7 churches.
  • Either we will learn from GOD’s dealings with HIS people in Scripture or we will be dealt with according to HIS ways in Life.
  • Either we are religious relegating God to the rear seat of our lives or we are in relationship with Him in the driving seat ever coming closer to Him, leaning upon His breast, being near Him
  • Either we are living the Way (Jesus) in the fear and love of God or we have the disposition of exalting pride where we think we know best, our decisions are best for us, our way pleases us – thus we exalt ourselves bending ourselves away from God in self-absorption replicating our forebears’ sin to be ‘like God’ – such is pure enmity towards God. This self-deifying attitude leads us to destruction, distance far from God
By Eagleholme

Religion is like a sausage

Religion is like a sausage, a skin of spirituality stuffed with pretense, conformity of beliefs to a set of codified doctrines to be performed and adhered to and compliance to rules, regulations and rites.

Jesus didn’t come to start a religion but to open the way to an intimate relationship with Himself and His Father through the Holy Spirit. His love through the Cross, His work to His resurrection and ascension has made the Way open; for He is the Way, only through Him and abiding in Him do we know His love and relationship.

Hear O People, the Lord our God is One! You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your might. How are you doing with this? Feeling inadequate like me? Regardless of where any of us are at Father wants us to enter into a closer relationship with Him. Religion can’t cut it when it comes to God. Communing of the heart does; He has come to metamorphoo us at the ground level of who we are, the heart. Thus the Prophets prophesied He would, thus Christ spoke to and thus is our inheritance, a changed heart and an abiding Christ within. He is never far from those who are His, He is within.

By Eagleholme

“Don’t merely go to church; be the Church” Revised 1 page

“I don’t go to church anymore Crock;  haven’t been much in the last two years.” her apprehensive look spoke volumes as I perceived she waited for the usual condemnation berating her failure to attend ‘meetings’.

She and her husband asked me to meet up with them in Sydney to discuss their distress at no longer being able to fit into the traditional church scene. They had been avid Pentecostals where Sundays was church. Their leadership positions meant they were consumed every weekend with ministry and home church during the week. Gifted leaders they were not pew sitters; not that I applauded their over-activity.

After many years of ‘faithful’ service conflict finally surfaced; as it must. Their spirituality, God, their Christian walk  and their friends of many years came crashing down around their ears over a few weeks. Their lives got turn upside down. Thankfully!

The events that followed ousted them from their mega-church and the group they ministered with each week in home cell group. Unfortunately the closest people in their cell who had been pleased to receive my friends ministry and support over many years were unable to be there for them in their hours of need.

Also their fellow mid-level lay leaders (what an abomination of a term!)  found it was too much of an ask to be there for them because  their energy and giftings were consumed by the mechanism to keep the organisation going with its programmes, meetings and events happening. In other words organisation was more important than love, compassion and faithfully supporting one another.

Unfortunately for my friends who had given so much over so many years the ‘clergy’ support they received was professional but not what they needed.

Financial disaster and the ensuing marriage break-up for one child, another married son and his wife were ‘wife’ swapping with two other couples in ‘lay’ leadership in the church; they exited the mega church leaving my friends distraught. Another had a serious accident and required months of rehabilitation. As a consequence they were unable to fulfil their roles of leadership in their mega church

That is when the proverbial poo hit the fan, so to speak. Their inability to perform and to be involved caused them to be out of contact with their many ‘friends’. The continuing escalation and the nature of their problems proved too hard for those who they had labored beside . Gradually their many church ‘friends’ faded away adopting other leaders to supply ministry my friends had vacated.

The revelation that they had done to others what their friends were now doing to them hit them causing added grief.

Grief happened for them on multiple fronts personal, social, spiritual, family, ministry, relationships, power, prestige and position – all ripped from them. They were left bereft, cast adrift without much support from those they had given so much to over many years. When I met them they were distraught in a quiet sort of way wondering what life was all about; wondering what they had given their lives to for so long. Yet strangely there was a faith that smelt of quality rather than distress. Hhhhmmm! They had gained a ‘trust‘ in the furnace.

However the protracted nature of  my friends’ ‘Job’ experience eventually saw them ignored and forgotten; in-brief the clergy rationale was “Sorry you have gone through this but get over it. We’re here for you when you need us”.

My friends were left to their own devices. Their grief was compounded.

As my friends were telling me this all too familiar story with an all too familiar ring which I heard on all too many occasions in one form or another; an anger began to rise within. I was not upset with my beloved friends’ pastors I knew all too well the prison of their inability to love; having been there too long myself. No, my anger was directed to a system and an evil intent that binds God’s people, that seduces God’s people to be other than He intended;

Church, for my friends had been the Sunday meeting where it all happened. Now that was gone. What was going to fill the void? They felt used and betrayed by those they had given so much to for so many years.

“Well Lord how do you feel about shepherds who are unable to look after your flock when their salary package, position and prestige demands attention elsewhere? Lord how do you feel about the suffering of your people like my friends?”

By Eagleholme

Fellowship depends upon active practical Love, the nature of Jesus Christ worked out in us

So often we ask where God is. Fellowship with God comes from love. His love for us. Then there is the feet on the planet stuff called us loving one another; as rare as love happens for most that is where we need to go.

Many are out of fellowship with God because they are out of fellowship with their brothers and sisters in His Family. Yet most I know either don’t know how to reconcile, forgive, repent, or in maturity extend grace to the recalcitrant. Over a period of fifty two years I have only three people come to me asking for forgiveness for wronging me. Now either I am so good I don’t transgress which is impossible being me (seems to be my specialty :-) ) or something else is at work here.

On two occasions I have had senior pastors instigate a ‘reconciliation’ meeting to restore another’s relationship with me. That was not pleasant to be confronted with my sin and the sin of others; but how necessary a dynamic is openness, transparency and honesty before one another (walking in the light). Without it we cannot function as the laos (people) of God.

So where have we gone so wrong that many are abused, hurt, injured in their dealings with each other in the Body?

Fellowship is inseparably linked with right relationships that function in love, through love, amongst love and for love. That is Christ among us, through us, by us and for us.

If we do not love it is a sign we are not walking with Him; that something is out of order, maybe we are out of sorts with a brother or a sister? Maybe you disagree with someone like me? What is a godly response to one such as I? lol, ahahahah, wouldn’t that be something – to be treated in a godly manner. Maybe being king of your pile and maintaining that position is more important to you than walking right with those around you?

Unless we love God and His children, we cannot fellowship either with God or man – one depends on the other – basic Christianity 101.

Maybe we are so accustomed to be carnal we think that is the ‘normal’ Christian life. Maybe holding the misdemeanours of others against them is all we know because we have no examples of ‘redeeming’ love expressed in the world we live. We comply to the leadership behaviour modelled before us. Godliness seems to have gone on a journey. Maybe the journey we need to take is back into our God? Maybe discovering intimacy with the Father is the cure of all our ills.

Walking in the light means we are in fellowship both with God and man; that there is no darkness in us; that we are laying our lives down for each other. Whether you say walking in the light or the Spirit, fellowship, laying down our lives, they are saying the same thing emphasising different aspect of being, walking with the Father in daily life.

Paul uses the word koinonia (gathering in fellowship because we hold in common) when he speaks of the Lord’s table in 1Cor 10. At the Table of the Lord we are both equal and one with each other; no hierarchy where there are even senior pastors and a division called ‘lay’ people (The Scriptures don’t have that division but our systems do!). All come as the ‘Laos’ (people) of God. I wonder whether the Master is pleased with our divisions that suit us, that lift up individuals at the expense of His Body, that make His Body far less than He means us to be? Hhhhmmm? It all depends on love, what do we love the more; have we left our first love and now travel as if all we love is important?

Maybe that is why we are like we are – we have forgotten to love or we have forgotten how to love. Maybe that is why we opt for overactivity to deaden the pain of our estrangement from God. Maybe that is why so many are sickly amongst us these days and even some die? Maybe we are so out of touch Could it be love is not as important to most as it is to the Lord.

Never let it be said we are a loveless lot; that would mean we are hypocrites, pretenders, reflecting a shallow religious belief.

Let us draw close to Him. There is all we need.

By Eagleholme

An Impression from the Lord; the 1970′s

Sometime ago I was contemplating what freedom is. As I looked back on my journey I realised I was a very different man to when the Lord first spoke to me about freedom. As I meditated I remembered the Lord calling me as a young man in August 1973, “Wayne, you are going to be free completely free, set my people free.” As the Holy Spirit spoke to me, my heart pondered those words so powerfully interrupting my grief and utter sense of profound shame.

As I contemplated the interuption I recalled an impression I received three months previously, graphically portrayed before my eyes at the National Conference of the Assemblies of God in Australia at Burleigh Heads on Queensland’s tourist playground, the Gold Coast.

I don’t know if it was a vision or not but it was so compelling in my spirit. I have never forgotten it. Allow me to share with you its details.

As I was standing on the left side of the National Conference hall of the assembled delegates from across Australia; a word came to me. Behind the podium a map of Australia was super-imposed over a flame of fire. As I looked at the map whether it was the Spirit of God or my fanciful imagination I don’t know but I received a compelling message in my spirit. At the time I had the sense that the Holy Spirit was wanting to speak to the conference that was deadlocked over a theological issue. Unfortunately I was too afraid to give what I had in my spirit. However the impression I received that day has stayed with me for nearly forty years.That message burns deep within me. For many years it has provided direction to my life.

God has something to say to His people and those who call themselves leaders, especially the assembled leaders at that time.

The impression I received was the Lord was going to refine His Church; then I saw a body covered in the muck and mire of the nation arise out of the map. As the Body arose I became aware it was made of pure gold. Then I noticed the muck and the mire of the nation began to sliver down the length of the body as the Body rose and the fire burnt like a furnace. The Body stood as pure gold refined and radiant in the midst of the land.

As I have pondered this message for nearly forty years I understand the enormity of the impossibility of it ever happening. Yet I believe with God all things are possible because of who He is; not because of who we are. Through the years I have only shared the message with a couple of people who I trust. For whatever reason the Holy Spirit has ‘compelled’ me to share this message now.

I was at the conference because three pastors had asked me to drive them from Brisbane to the conference on the Gold Coast at Burleigh Heads Convention Centre. Particularly I did not share with these three wonderful brothers who I drove to the conference. Today I wish I had. I think they would have been gracious to me, encouraging and redemptive. Simply I was in such a dark hole, in a well of my own making; I was covered in the muck and mire of the pit I had fallen into – I felt less than perfect (to say the least). How could I be any different in the midst of such successful brothers and sisters (as the years progressed I learnt my assessment was not the fair dinkum truth – if only they had been open, honest and transparent about their condition I could have dealt with my stuff easier).

These two events are part of a journey God has used to form  me these forty plus years. It has been a long journey and an uncomfortable one.

I leave this with you to make of it what you will before the Lord. I will be sharing other interludes in a long history from the Wilderness. I trust they will encourage you.

By Eagleholme